How It Started
This is not a story about how everything started. It’s more about this specific project and a few things I learned during the doing. This project started with a gift from my son and daughter-in-law. They gave me this beautiful glass ornament that has a tree inside of it. I just so happen to love colored glass and this was one of those gifts that was absolutely perfect. But…
The ornament is big. And glass. And I was pretty concerned that there is no trustworthy way to hang it without a real possibility of it breaking under its own weight. And so it began, the planning for some type of base to hold it securely and, hopefully, in a manner befitting how beautiful I think it is.
Pregaming
This past November, after Thanksgiving and several years of waxing and waning interest in consumer grade CNC lasers and with the encouragement of my partner-in-life, I bought an xTool M1 laser and blade cutting machine. I might, at some point, write more about this decision but it doesn’t matter right now. I bought this machine with the idea that I would be able to use it to create things which is something I enjoy doing. I set about reading and watching videos; joining a couple Facebook groups; and trying some thing out.
One of my first actual projects was to make Christmas ornaments. I made some for the Executive Committee board members for Evergreen Indiana as well as my admin colleagues. I also made some ornaments for loved ones that had a recipe worth passing down. It was fun, and I was proud to be able to share these things.
Mistakes are progress
And that’s when the (almost) inevitable happened. I started thinking “I could turn this into a side hustle.” That’s something I’ve done over and over in this life. I crocheted angels to sell. I made cards to sell. I made t-shirt quilts and jewelry. I’ve even sold art. In fact, anything that I’ve created has always been accompanied by the thought, “Maybe this is the thing that makes me rich.”
I know. That sounds awful, and I don’t really want to be rich (not exactly). I just don’t want to worry about putting gas in the gas tank, buying groceries, giving gifts, or the myriad things that money helps with. And I’ve always looked at those things I could do and those things I make as a possible mechanism to alleviate that worry.
As I was working on this base using this new tool that provides new opportunities, I was first thinking, “How do I make this thing pay for itself?” I felt guilty for having bought this thing that I’ve been interested in for years. And then it occurred to me that it is okay to just have hobbies for oneself. I could play around making things with this machine until it falls to pieces and never make anything for anyone else or sell anything I made. And it would be okay.
The Journey
I’m coming to a point in my life where I’m laying down a lot of the preconceptions (and, likely, misconceptions) I used as guide rails until now. In particular, I’m laying aside the idea that my purpose is to be productive. Does that mean that I won’t make things as gifts? No. I enjoy giving gifts, and I enjoy making…and making gifts. Does it mean that I won’t ever sell anything? No. But I don’t have to. I can experiment and mess up and experiment some more.
The End isn’t the End
When I started planning the base for this globe, the Tree of Strength, I thought I had a pretty clear vision of what I was wanting to accomplish. It turns out that for all my planning, I didn’t really know exactly what I was doing. Several times along the way, I had to make decisions about continuing, adapting, and accepting. In the end, it didn’t turn out very close to what I determined would be “a success.” But what did happen is that I made something something I’d never made before that did exactly what it was supposed to do – safely display that orb of glass.
Even now I look at it and think, “that wasn’t the plan. Thank goodness it didn’t go to plan.” Thank goodness every time I thought I could turn my hobby into a gig, it didn’t work. Thank goodness I didn’t get consigned to the “artist” category or the “custom laser product” category. Thank goodness I get to explore and experiment without the expectation that I must be productive or even generative.
And while I’m thanking goodness, thank goodness for loved ones who know I love shiny, fragile things.
